My husband’s first job out of college was teaching junior and senior high classes in a private Christian school in Kansas. He was soon initiated into the trials of trying to convince pre-teens and teens to learn, do homework, spit out their gum, pay attention, sit still, not pass notes, take notes on the lecture, and work hard.
Since we were fairly new Christians, we were always surprised at the behavior from the kids from Christian families. We wrongly expected them to be always mature, always spiritual, always holy. Instead, they were kids. Most of the kids were growing up in homes where their parents longed them to seek after the Lord, but at this age, their desires didn’t always match up with their parents’.
After routinely hearing, “That’s not fair,” when performing obvious responsibilities as a teacher, Scott received a mantra from fellow teacher, Mike. Over and over Mike drilled into the heads of his fifth grade students-
“Fair is a selfish human doctrine, a fable and a myth.”
Mike explained that life didn’t give you exactly what everyone else was getting, expecially pointing out the hypocrisy that people only wanted “fairness” with blessings, not with trials.
He reminded them that most cries for “fairness” were covers for covetness, wanting something that someone else had or earned.
He reminded them that there were rules for safety and order, not for fairness.
He reminded them that some kids earned rewards, other kids were denied rewards for not achieving goals.
He reminded kids that authority had to be righteous and just, not “fair.”
Above all, he stressed to these kids to trust the Lord, accept what He allowed in their lives, and to be thankful in everything.
One night, Mike made a late light run to the store, but didn’t return home in the expected time. His wife, Robin, had put their two little girls to bed and was lumbering her very pregnant body around the house, trying to finish up some cleaning and ironing. When she heard sirens near their home, she assumed Mike was delayed because he stopped to help. That was the compassionate kind of man he was.
The Lord gave her a hymn to sing and a blanket of peace, as she prayed for the accident victims and the rescue personnel. Her peace was shattered by a knock on the door. An elder from her church arrived with a police officer. Her husband hadn’t been helping in the accident, Mike’s life had been taken in the accident.
You might be thinking that life isn’t fair; he died too young. He never gazed on the face of his handsome son, Michael Junior. He never saw his two young daughters blossom into women. The love of his life, Robin, was left alone and was devastated by her loss. Her heart and life were shattered, but not her faith. She trusted the Lord through all of this, and she was able to give the Lord much glory and honor. At Mike’s funeral, many heard the Gospel and lives were changed. It wasn’t “fair,” it was God-honoring, life-changing and faith-growing for many people.
Mike lived and died in the will of the Lord, bringing Him much glory with the conviction and acceptance that –
“Fair is a selfish human doctrine, a fable and a myth.”
Disciples Of Christ says
At the school I teach in, there is a saying "Fair is not Equal and Equal is not Fair" It goes very well with what you posted. Love you,Jenny
Ruby says
A touching story and a truth we all need to hear. Thanks Mindy. This same advice has been passed on to me inn "unfair" trials, and I have attempted to pass it on, especially to my children. Life just ain't fair, but we keep pressing toward the mark.
Melissa says
what a good word, and thoughtful explanation for a catch phrase. Thank you.
Diane Allen says
This is exactly what we need to hear at all ages of life — thank you. I'll keep this in my "things I want to say to my children" folder.
Micah says
I needed this. Thank you..it's so true.