Four months ago I blogged about Why Mommies Yell. I knew I wanted to revisit the topic, but wanted to pray through it more. I’m always a little cautious to give advice. It seems the minute you step out to speak on an area where you think the Lord has given you a little victory or a little Biblical wisdom, you are tested and fail. I was worried if I blogged too much about yelling, I would end up being a yellbox again.
The heart of the matter, I feel, is actually anger. I blogged through Mommy Temper Tantrums and Identifying Anger.
Then I began blogging through the reasons Why Mommies Get Angry. As we start a new week, we’ll be covering individual topics to spur us all on to be the most God-honoring mommies we can be.
Understanding the sin nature of your children is a good start, but only a start.
Once you’ve erased that misconception that children are supposed to be good, now you can remove the misconception that parenting is only about raising children.
It’s not.
Scott and I jumped into parenting with great enthusiasm, wanting to obey everything in the Bible about parenting. We wanted to please the Lord. We wanted to honor the Lord. We wanted to bring Him glory with our six children, the lives that we wanted to offer as our living sacrifices to the Lord.
Even though I understood their job was to sin, I had a hard time grasping the concept that despite my initial patience, forgiveness, teaching, instruction, discipline and spiritual passion to raise them right, I was having to repeatedly correct them about the same things
over
and over
and over
and over
and over
and over.
I wept to my husband Scott in frustration that the kids would NEVER be victorious. Of course, I had great spiritual desires for their lives, but I was beginning to wonder if I would even be able to train them in something as simple as just flushing the toilet. Seriously. It had been a long day.
It wasn’t just about the inconveniences to my life children’s disobedience brings, I truly and seriously wanted my kids to be victorious Christians and to experience the spiritual blessings that come with obedience.
Scott did something better than just sympathising and helping discipline the kids. He opened my eyes to the reality of the situation.
“Well, honey, now you know how the Lord feels when He has to forgive us for the same things over and over.”
Ouch.
Touche’.
When I compared myself as a child of God to my children, my sins were greater. I knew better. I was older. I had been reading the Bible for a long time. I had NO excuse to be making the same mistakes over and over.
So, after years of training, talking, disciplining, teaching, correcting, loving, ….our eyes were finally opened to the truth of what was happening in our lives.
We began to joke about the new title of the parenting book we would never actually write.
We have to understand the perfecting work going on in our own lives. Raising children is a major contributor to our spiritual growth.
Honestly think back to your childhood. Is there anything your parents tried to work out of your life and you rejected their instruction? Maybe there are things you wish your parents had pointed out to you, things you should have conquered in your youth. If that work still needs to be done in your life, your kids will take over the job your parents weren’t able to do.
Remember your Mom telling you were rude? Ever react rudely to a naughty child?
Did your Dad ever tell you to stop getting angry at your siblings? Do you ever get angry with your kids?
If you haven’t overcome the sins of your youth, children will continue that work in your heart until you conquer. And the cycle will continue. Whatever your child doesn’t work out in their youth, your grandchildren will work out of them.
Yea, it’s a beautiful cycle.
But, the purpose of the whole cycle is to bring us to saving knowledge of the Lord Jesus Christ, and then to be daily transformed into His beautiful image.
Because, it really isn’t just about raising children. It’s about raising Mommies – Christ-like Mommies.
~ Tandis ~ says
"When I compared myself as a child of God to my children, my sins were greater. I knew better. I was older. I had been reading the Bible for a long time. I had NO excuse to be making the same mistakes over and over." I had these same thoughts awhile back that I was to God as my kids were to me. The only problem with me is that I sin in how I deal with my kids while God patiently teaches me. This blog brought a lump to my throat just as the one you wrote four months ago did. I hate to yell but over and over again, I do. Thank you for encouraging and teaching me. Please repost this blog often. 🙂 Haha.
6intow says
As usual thanks for sharing your encouraging thoughts. I heard a radio broadcast about this topic as well — how our children raise us. That is true on so many levels. Thank you for making me think.~Erin