I didn’t buy When Love Dies:How to Save a Hopeless Marriage by Judy Bodmer for me. I bought it because I’m an elder’s wife and I thought it would be a good tool for the occasional marriage encouragement we do with couples.
I was also curious. I know the author, Judy, as we’re both members of the Northwest Christian Writers’ Association. She’s a director for the annual Northwest Christian Writers’ Renewal and I’ve been privileged to volunteer alongside her for several years. She’s an amazing older woman I’ve grown to love and admire. On the occasion I’ve watched Judy and her husband work together, I’ve seen their mutual admiration, respect and affection and thought, "Judy? Really? She had marriage troubles? And she’s willing to admit it?"
Christians don’t always do that. Sometimes we put on our church clothes and our church words and play a part. We don’t always delve into personal lives the way we should for mutual encouragement and burden-bearing.
Do you know anyone you could walk up to right now and truly confess what you’re going through? Would you get the spiritual wisdom you need? Would your confidence be kept?
Judy caught my heart, by opening hers. She graciously combines the wisdom of human experience and the wisdom from her study of the Word of God. Through the printed page, she is the wiser, older woman your heart has been longing to know.
I made the mistake of reading this on an airplane with only half a package of travel tissue, ya’ know, those little ones you carry in your purse, but the tissue is folded up so much, that by the time you get it all the way unfolded, you need more than one?
I began taking notes of her admonitions and I knew I would be reading this book again. And again….and again…
There isn’t any marriage that’s at a state of perfection and doesn’t need encouragement. I wasn’t packing the suitcase on the way out of the door, but I learned how to keep it from getting to that point.
But, this book doesn’t relate to only marriage, it relates to ANY relationship you have. When you see the word “husband” just substitute the name of anyone you are struggling with.
Like she was peeking through the dirty windows of my heart, Judy describes the Symptoms of An Unforgiving Heart, p. 41
1. Blowing up over seemingly small things
2. Sarcastic remarks that are meant to hurt
3. Talking about your husband to others
4. Criticizing
5. Correcting
6. Unexplained headaches, stomach problems, fatigue
7. A bout of tears for no apparent reason
Though the book is written at a time when her marriage was struggling, it could be read by newlyweds to keep themselves from getting to that point. It could be read by happily married couples, to have an even better marriage.
I didn’t buy When Love Dies for me, but it was exactly the book I didn’t know I needed to read.
It also might also be the book you didn’t know you needed to read.
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Despite trying for days to use one of those fancy blog give-away plug-ins, I couldn’t figure it out. We’re still going to do the old-fashioned way this week.
My giveaway will be open from Wednesday, February 13th at 5am Pacific time until Monday, February 18th at 12:00pm.
There are three ways to enter. You may enter three times if you qualify for each of the three different options.
1. Leave a comment on this blog about something you do to keep love alive in your marriage. We all could use the encouragement! Include your email address.
and/or
2. Like my Mindy Peltier Author page. Click on the FB icon to find me. Return to this blog post and leave a separate comment letting me know you did this. (All new followers will get credit for this, even if you liked me before the give-away.) Include your email address.
and/or
3. Become a follower of this blog if you aren’t already. Look for this and fill out your email address. Leave a comment letting me know you are a new follower. Include your email address.
MANDITORY! You must leave your email address with each entry. I can’t find you without it. Entries without email addresses will be deleted.
Thank you for visiting my blog, I appreciate all my followers and visitors! May you always find encouragement for the journey when you visit here.
Tandis says
1. We go to bed together every night. Then we talk for another hour or more. It’s a very small number of nights in our 8 1/2 years of marriage that we haven’t done this. We enjoy it. We discuss everything. I think it is something very important in our marriage!!
2. I think I was #6 of something on the FB “like” page. 🙂
3. Yep, did that too. I try to read every blog… even the ones that convict my heart because you’re like Judy to me. 🙂
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Katie Martinson says
I am so glad I found you!! I have been wondering where you went 🙂 I don’t feel like I have a lot of marriage experience or advice to give, but I am going to go with; laugh at yourself… often. It seems to work for us, if one of us is laughing at ourselves, it makes it seem not so bad… whatever it is. That and in this busy time of like, we make dates a priority… whenever we can! 😉 Glad I found you!
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Karen says
Mindy, why didn’t you tell me about this book when I visited you last weekend?! I have a friend who is really struggling and I have been praying for the last few days how to respond to her e-mail. This book may be just the answer to my prayer. Thanks for sharing your insights. BTW thanks for a really great four days. You and Scott are such great hostesses. We love you.
wholeheartedhome says
Get over it!! Forgive!! And keep putting his clothes in the laundry and washing them, cooking nice meals for him, and doing sweet things for him. When things go wrong between you and your husband, these things will help and especially if you continue doing them no matter what!!
This sounds like a great book!! I already won your last giveaway, so you’d better disqualify me 🙂
But ladies, Mindy is the VERY BEST giveaway blogger in the blogisphere!! She packs all her love into the box with the book and makes it so special and exciting!!!!! Love you Mindy!!
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Karen Hessen says
Since we were married in our late forties and won’t have as many anniversaries to celebrate as a lot of couples, we celebrate monthly, called monthaverseries. We are now into the 190’s.
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Kim says
I liked your facebook page. Always love reading your inspiring work. You are a wonderful person, friend and mother.
Kim
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Maureen Lytle says
Hi, MIndy! Forgive, forgive, forgive and overlook the unimportant things. Life is too short to keep accounts. I’m entering the contest! 🙂 Use this e-mail address: [email protected] if I win.
Love,
Maureen
lifeonacheeseplatter says
One of my favorite movies is “Fireproof.” It’s my default movie for a background soundtrack when I just want to have something on when I’m doing laundry or other housework. For any who haven’t seen it, it’s about the power of God’s love healing a broken marriage. I am thankful for God’s ability to restore relationships and give us His love to love others (and for a great marriage counselor! 🙂 ) A line from the movie- “Everybody needs counseling.” 🙂 I hope I win the contest! 😉
lifeonacheeseplatter says
Oh yeah! my email addy is [email protected] 🙂
Jennifer Brainard says
I “liked” youon Facebook. (Although I have LOVED you from the first time I met you!!!
Jenny
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